Dependant on the state we are in, and ability to function in any productive way should dictate what outside help is necessary. I was unable to function at all in the world at that time, so there was little alternative than seeking affordable therapy, and using chemicals to get through my days.

My response was in no way a suggestion on what you should do, but a response to your original question 'Why should I even bother changing?' Therapy indeed isn't for everyone, but we must do what we can to build a cohesive network to strengthen our resolve, and catch us if we fall.

Neither Money nor Power guarantee a healthy mind or outlook...and at that stage in my life I had neither.....all I had was my willingness and hope to make positive changes.

Be kind to yourself DarknessIsMyFriend.....I hope that you find the road that will take you onward to where you want to go.