Hello mal500: I'm sorry I probably can't be of much help with regard to this. (Actually my wife & I have been married for the same number of years as your parents. However neither of us have any extended family of any consequence left. So extended family issues are not something I have a lot of experience with.) I also notice you live in South Korea. So I presume there may be some cultural aspects to this of which I would be unaware.

About the only thing I can say here is that what went on between your mother & her siblings is all stuff that is between them. It's not your place nor your responsibility to try to ventilate it. Having said that, I think Bill3's advice is sound. Speak to those family members who are willing to speak with you. Do your best to establish friendly personal relationships with everyone. But realize that there is family history here you cannot change. If the situation with the family simply causes you too much "dread"... my recommendation is... skip the family events.

I see this is your first post here on PC. So... to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! May the time you spend here be of benefit.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!