Quote:
Originally Posted by Waterbear
Something in your email did not sit right with me and it is the statement "I am only walking besides you, helping you to read some of the signs."
I can assure you that, whether you know it or not, you are doing a lot more than that. The word "only" has no place in that sentence. Me allowing somebody, and somebody wanting "to walk by my side" is such an enormous thing that "only" is not a word that fits there.
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I agree with you on the word "only"... maybe that is what she is seeing from her point; however, I can see how much more your T (my T) does from my side of the equation. Maybe the "only" is there because they are not doing anything but be allowed to walk beside us. What I mean by that... is that it is us doing the work, doing the risking, doing the trusting .... ... ... granted I could just as much argue how much more T is doing "than walking beside me" that is helping me trust and believe in her.
I think it is ok to tell your T that she is much more than "only" someone walking beside you and how these other things that make her who she is and what she does... has allowed you to become someone you are comfortable with being beside you and you believe that she wants to be beside you (yes I see the difference here too). And even tell her that using the word "only" felt like it minimized, or something, her role in your life and your relationship.
I think it is ok to tell her in whatever form of communication that would be comfortable for you... email, card, letter, ... in session.
I think it is ok, as well, to just sit with the knowledge that she is much more than that regardless of what she thinks/says.