Recovery after something like that wouldn't be fast or easy, but I'm sure it helps to realize that someone cared enough about you to keep you alive. There must be a reason for that. Try to hold on to the realizations you have made, and keep moving forward from here. Make sure that you have enough support. We're here for the asking, but you need people IRL too.
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“We should always pray for help, but we should always listen for inspiration and impression to proceed in ways different from those we may have thought of.”
– John H. Groberg