(((((justy)))))

To me, it seemed perfectly clear that you distanced yourself from her because you did not want to be influenced by her drinking; and a good idea that was too. I'm sorry she caused so much upset to you and your household, but it is none of your fault. Yes, you were angry with the boy yesterday, but that was natural under the circumstances. Today, now that you are calmer, you can look back on this and pick on yourself for things you did and did not do. However, I think that the way you behaved in the circumstances is understandable and I would probably have behaved in a similar way.
I understand your need for a firm real-life friendship, but I can't see how a friendship with her would do you any good. Is it possible for you to buy yourself a pet and get loved and companionship from that?