Dear Dr. S,

I have a world of feelings right now regarding life in general and towards you. I am mad at you and I love you. I don't want to see you tomorrow and I can't imagine life without you. I doubt I email you again and I so much want to hear from you. I want to do so much today yet I can't seem to get very much motivation to do more than move from bed to computer back to bed.

I want to eat and I want to feel good in my body like when I was starving myself.

I don't want to cancel for tomorrow, I don't want you to cancel on me tomorrow, I don't want to talk to you tomorrow... Maybe I still want to see you, I don't want to tell you anything or talk to you about anything. I don't even want to talk at all.

What am I going to do?
- me