Hello everyone,

Due to intense anxiety and paranoia, I have a habit of job hopping.
I don't know why but i have always quit jobs by just walking out and it causes me so much embarrassment.
I am 31 and just feel my reputation must be so ruined. I am a good worker but make such a holy show of myself whenever i quit.
The thing is that i was working for a large company and then suffered a huge mental breakdown from anxiety issues ( irrational ones, i just get so paranoid and think people are talking about me ) and did my usual thing of just walking out and disappearing.

I got a new job - did the same thing - my old boss from the first job has offered me a new position which i accepted but I am plagued by the self doubt due to how I feel my former colleagues will think about me. I am scared they are all going to be laughing at me saying I am a loser and that I am the butt of the jokes. I feel so concerned about this that i am obsessing now. I don't start the new role until next week but I am so worried about taking this anxiety with me and scared it will cause me to go into a spiral and am worried i will do something destructive like not accept the job because i am too afraid and then I will end up unemployed for the sake of pride.

Negative overthinking is really really affecting my life and I was wondering if anyone has experienced this sort of thing before. I am always obsessing over how people perceive me and think I could have some sort of narcisstic personality disorder.

Any views on this would really be appreciated.

Thank you,
Molly xo