i journal, but i don't have super weird/scary things i don't remember writing. i can be very dissociated and write and know i'm writing but not fully remember it when i go back and read it. though there are things over the years i don't remember writing, but that also can just be because so many years have passed combined with having been highly dissociated then.

i used to be able to write poetry before i was able to verbalize things. they still tell a lot about how things are at times now with the others/dissociation which is interesting to me if i go back and read them (rarely because it scares me to). i always feel like i can't verbalize things but can usually find writing that was done that does describe it.