((safe hug))) I am sure you feel that way, if you had "just lived life" but I think you would be even worse for wear now, had you not worked in therapy. Those with DID can manage with that way of coping for a long time, but it does eventually break down as they age and is no longer anything suitable to live with, imo. While therapy is always a good idea with this dx, it can seem terribly depressing in and of itself I think, if one waits until near the end of life to try and figure out why all the "craziness" and inability to manage life.

One more day without PTSD... yeah, that would be nice. But why wish for something you can't have? It only makes one more disappointed I think.