T,
I don't know what's wrong with me. We had a discussion on Friday about how you can tell I'm truly trying to implement the strategies you teach me, that I come to every session because I want to get better. That's true, but at the same time I keep choosing to engage in self destructive behaviors because there's some small part of me that wants to ruin my own life. I don't know why, and that part of me scares me. I have no idea why I would want to ruin my own life but I do. I think it stems from the hoplessness I have that I will never get better.
I'm sorry, T. I really am trying. I promise to try harder. Please don't be disappointed in me.
Annie