So usually I post in here when I've failed. But this time I'm posting cause I was good. So I pretty much had a mental break down this weekend. I've been having nightmares of when I was raped as a child, among other things (my nightmares pop up in spells every now and then when I'm stressed) and what happens but one of my best friends (also a cousin) calls me sobbing cause she was violently raped. But she won't do anything about it. So I'm freaking out because I can't help her (she's home in ND, and I'm at school in FL) and I can't get in touch with anyone to go be with her (it was 5:30 in the morning). And then my best friend gets mad at me and yells at me because I got pissy and distracted and wouldn't tell him what was wrong (he hadn't asked). So I'm trying to deal with my cousin and my friend and all the other %#@&#! that's piling up, and just lost it on saturday night. Cried my eyes out for hours. And really wanted to cut. Got the razors out and everything. But didn't. I just kept thinking that if I did I would only feel worse. And I picked myself up the next day, and got in touch with someone who dragged my cousin to the hospital and the police, so that was taken care of. I'm not obsessing over the friend thing like I normally do, and I've been studying for finals and accomplishing things. I think the mental break down was needed for me to start climbing back up to sanity. Anyway, just thought I'd share good news for once.