Jennifer, I don't know why you feel depressed, as I have not looked at any of your threads on here before. But in general, I too feel like calling it quits.

I just miss how my support (and life) used to be. It was never rosy, and for the past 16 or so years, it's like my head has been in a blender. But I do miss my flat in that supported accommodation, to a degree. It was not the greatest flat in the city. Allegedly, it has dampness. However, I liked seeing the staff next door at night, as you were allowed to hang around in there up to 11 PM, and I try to be social with people whenever I can, even though I've been plagued by this horrible anxiety that I cannot seem to shake off. I've always been a people person like my late gran was, but a lot of people have betrayed me, and to be honest, major depression can take years off your life. It can even make you feel as if you are unable to trust people anymore.

The flat was a place to chill, at least, and having your own flat is great, as you can arrange everything how you want it (unlike the shithole I reside in now).

I've been back with my family since 2014 in a very cluttered environment, due to being betrayed by that autism agency. Not counting the numerous trips to jail for silly things like sending online messages and mailing out letters to these former support workers who got me charged, the last several years have indeed been a nightmare in more ways than one.

I have to bid on 3 properties every week on this Key to Choice website, and with homeless priority, it's still a progressive monotony. You are supposed to get higher up on this mystical priority list after a year or so, provided they granted you 'silver priority' in the first place, or some crap like that. Without this dubious priority in place, you can forget about getting any house from the Edinburgh council if you are not working full-time. It apparently takes up to 100 years at the rate they told me about. And it also doesn't help that landlords are extremely picky about accepting people on benefits as well. Private lets are just way too risky, and sometimes a reasonable price can eventually increase. Many of the leases are not permanent either, so you can find yourself back at the first rung on the ladder, with the boring cycle repeating again.

I was keen to get either paid or voluntary work as an extra in movies as I've loved movies all my life, but with all the slandering that occurred on social media in recent memory, the inconsistency of it all, and the stress, it just seems like the hassle isn't worth it anymore. I'm really so fed up by this stage.