</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
darkeyes said:
The one that hurt me, claimed that it's part of a therapists code of ethics they are to follow,etc.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">I've decided I don't agree with that. If a therapist doesn't want to accept gifts, I think they should have their own reason rather than some generic code. For you darkeyes, it was your last time seeing this T, a way of saying thank you, and it's not like this gift would curry you special favor with your T because you wouldn't ever be seeing him again. I think his refusal to accept your heartfelt gift was an error and lacked class. Didn't his mama teach him manners? I'm sorry you got hurt by that.

I know my T has accepted a gift before because I saw a big bunch of flowers in his office once, obviously from earlier in the day. I could just picture a grateful client or couple giving him the flowers as a way of saying thank you. Maybe it was their last session and he had helped put their marriage back together. Who knows? But something worthy of their thanks and a gift! I think it speaks well of him that he had the grace to accept.

Dustin, I am not sure I would ever give my T a birthday or holiday gift (he doesn't celebrate Christmas), but I would surely consider giving him a parting gift, or a special thank you gift after a major accomplishment (like when my divorce is final). I think you should go with what your heart says. I think a card with a heartfelt note is always appropriate.