I have been in college for about 3 years and im a junior. well ive changed my major a few times so im kind of in between freshman and sophomore because i went from english to zoology so all those lit classes i took mean nothing and i have to take all this math now. so im basically burnt out on school and need a break. plus its just so expensive and i wanted a chance to work and get ahead on bills so that next fall i wont be working 40 hours and going to school full time. so i cancelled my loans, and my aid blah blah blah and then last night my mom called me basically calling me an idiot for about 20 minutes because now i wont have health insurance.

so im 20. in the best shape im ever going to be in. i have maybe a few cigarettes a week and hardly ever drink alcohol. i walk several miles a week in addition to normal things like playing with the dog etc... so im pretty healthy and have been told so by my doctors. not to mention that i get health insurance through the school anyways. so she just yelled at me telling me that im not going to have health insurance which i dont really see as a huge deal but apparently she does. i know shes a mom and shes going to worry but worrying doesnt include calling me stupid.

i dont get it. i got the best grades out of all my siblings. did the smart thing and used birth control and all that so i didnt get pregnant like my sister did. i work 40 hours a week and go to school full time while maintaining a 4.0. and all this isnt enough to show my mom that i can take care of myself?

when i told my dad, brother, friends, classmates and everyone else they said, take a break, if youre burnt out on school then take a semester off so youll be excited to go back in 8 months. my brother said its no big deal and ill be fine. my dad said the same thing because my dad trusts me that whatever situation i get myself into i can get myself out and always have. but for some reason no matter what i do i just cant prove to her that im responsible and i know what im doing. grrr....

and she doesnt even seem to care that shes making me bawl my eyes out because having your parents be disappointed in you is like the worst feeling. so im sitting there crying to her telling her im sorry but i have to do this she keeps going on about how this is going to affect her! so finally i just said "mom, this isnt you. this is my decision and i made it and im the one living with it" and she just said "fine, whatever" and i could tell she wasnt listening to anything i said. the whole time i was sitting there talking she was just ignoring me.

and also, were moving back to dayton. uhauls are about 400 bucks. security deposits, pet deposits, application fees, gas to get there etc etc all costs a lot of money. we cant make that money while going to school. were barely surviving now with me going to school and not able to work as much.

sorry. i just needed to vent. my boyfriend spent all night trying to console me and telling me that once my mom calms down that she will see my point and not be so harsh but i know my mom better than that.

oh yeah and i forgot. i told her i was stopped birth control because its messing me up and turning me crazy. and she thinks that is basically asking to get pregnant. i said i know your generation was taught only abstinance education and you probably think condoms and spermicide are not effective at all but i would go without sex before going with unsafe sex. and she doesnt believe me on that either. i already talked to my boyfriend and he said "if getting off birth control is going to make you feel better then i dont have to have sex. its not a big deal" and i told her that but she still thinks im an idiot i guess.

GRRRRRR