Sunny, Jennifer, sometimes i ask myself these same questions, seems to be a daily thing for me. I do understand what all of you are going through. I feel i am disabled but most therapists or professionals tell me im not or its not enough to get disability. When i was a kid i was hyperactive, and had special classes and held back from grades, told i had bipolar or ADHD or severe depression. All my life i have struggled to maintain a job, most i cant keep longer then a month. Once again i am unemployed and things just keep getting harder and i feel i have lost the will to live and wish i wasnt here anymore. Started seeing a therapist who i feel doesnt understand my situation. its so hard to keep going i really dont know what keeps me going. I do hope all of you find a way to persevere and beat this horrible monster. your words and struggles give me some hope and we can hopefully beat our troubles together. Thank you for your posts.