My Support Forums - View Single Post - Hugs in therapy - only for the clients sake? Therapist doesn´t need our hugs.

SarahSweden · Apr 14, 2017 at 04:49 PM

Thanks. When I started to see this counselor we hugged when we met, before we sat down and talked and then I´ve continued to do so. Now, after seeing her 10+ times it would feel awkward to just pass her in the hallway or in the door entrance and not give her a hug.

But now when I feel as I do I sure think about it, to say hello in a kind manner of course but not initiate the hug. I´ve never felt the hug as some kind of comfort as the hug is so temporary and bound to that specific time, it´s not comfort when I need it, when I´m sad or such.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MessyD

I'm not a huggy person, and I almost never initiate a hug, however if s closer person needs a hug and initiates it I don't mind, and it sometimes makes me feel good too. Unless it's someone I don't know well, then it's just uncomfortable. I would probably never ask for hug from therapist and I wouldn't want him to hug me when I'm sad but he did initiate once when I was going away for a while. I think it was probably more for me than him, not sure, but it did feel right and appropriate and it stayed with me for a while
I think most of the time one person wants the hug more than the other and people often offer a hug to comfort a person, not for their own satisfaction, so I would say enjoy it if you can get it. Or maybe if it was less frequent, not every time you see each other, it would mean more? Maybe once you and your therapist got used to it, it seems more mechanical than genuine, so it doesn't have that comforting effect?