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Old Apr 16, 2017, 11:27 AM
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19J82 19J82 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2017
Location: England
Posts: 95
Much like Naynay, I maintain a mask of sanity, I can't help it and I can't drop it. I am able to smile and tell people I'm fine when I'm thinking of how I can kill myself before the day's up. I've had several conversations with Police officers (to my shame) when I've been drink driving and speeding whilst manic and not had anything happen to me, I've walked around work thinking that I'm actually a superhuman created by the government because I'm so much better than all those around me yet nobody sees it.
It finally caught up with me last year and some behaviour in a manic state resulted in me being arrested. After the arrest I was diagnosed as having Bipolar, but now the authorities doubt the diagnosis because of the job I was in before, and because of how I present myself.
I'm now having to find published evidence to back up my claims that my behaviour has been as a result of Bipolar and that I'm not acting and using mental illness as an excuse. It would be far easier if I wore rags and howled at the moon; they don't seem to believe you're ill unless you fit a 1950's caricature of mental illness.
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