My T asked me Why do you think you are who you are. Poof the light bulb finally came on after so many years.

1. If you cry I will give you something to cry about (parents)
2. You never do anything right. You screw up everything (parents-somethings I screwed up did not even invole me, but it was my fault)
3. You are not college material, you will fail out in your first semester. (high school teacher- I had a 4.0 my first semester thank you very much.)
4.You can't be in the play because you are not smart enough and will forget the words. (second grade teacher)
5. You can't do a sewing project for mothers day, because you are in the slower reading group. You guys in the slow group may hurt yourselves. (third grade teacher- you know what I was smart, actually found out later in life that I am gifted and that is why I did not fit in so well.)
6. You should switch majors because you will never make it as a performer.( No you should stop making all of your students cry on a weekly basis. Plus I am double majoring in pre med. I don't plan on performing, just majoring in it for fun.)
7. You can't have the applications for scholarships because you don't qualify. (***** HS counselor- I snuck in her office, took one off her desk and guess what I got a 400$ book scholarship.)
8. No body cares if you kill yourself, we don't want selfish people around and you will soon be forgotten.(So called therapy group leader- how does she even have a job still I don't know)
9. If you are going to cut then just don't cut too deep. (crisis line worker- she actually got promoted after I reported this)
10. My best friend who thinks I am asleep having sex in the floor with the guy I was seeing.
11. Police sent to my house for suicide attempt saying we don't have time for this bull %#@&#!, there are people really worth saving out there that need us. (So then *&^%ing let me die)
12. My best friend tells me I wish you were dead don't talk to me, look at me, ect..... (I tried to die, heart actually stopped, thank God I survived, for now I see what I would have missed )

Number eight an on occured after I seeked treatment. Everything else lead to my troubles.

I thank God everyday that I somehow made it through my life so far. I am glad he saved me on my suicide attempts because I would have never seen my daughter or husband who I love to death.