Just after some honest advice...

So my ex-husband and I have been separated for over a year now and he has recently started seeing someone else. This new woman finds it very strange that he and I still have joint finances, including investment properties (one of which he is currently living in). She told him that she can't be with someone who is still attached like that to his ex. She finds the whole situation odd.

I can understand that, but however, she also doesn't have permanent residency in Australia (comes from a large Italian family all currently living together in one mansion, also has 2 kids). She does not have a job as her psychology degree in Italy is not recognised here in Australia. They have already been speaking about marriage only after knowing each other for 1 month!! For me there are so many red flags.

I think she is just after security to have a man provide for her financially and her kids and she isn't comfortable with the fact that my ex and I are still very amicable. We also have two young children together which is why we ensure that our relationship stays this way.

What are your thoughts on this situation? I'm upset that a stranger is already trying to lay ground rules in a subtle way and interfering in a 12 year long relationship and marriage that has only recently ended.

Am I over reacting? I'm such a mess right now. Part of me wants to be a cow and hold off on agreeing to a divorce and speaprating finances just to spite her and so she doesn't get her own way. But at the same time that is not good for myself. My ex and I agreed last year that there was no rush to do this. Funny how it only takes some one to come along and dictate what they want and men will just go along with it!