hi everyone,
i have posted about my work before, but long story short, i have been doing the same job for the last 15 years, the last 4 or 5 years, my manager has been on my case to paying more attention to detail, and the last year or two its about the amount of mistakes i have been making, she keeps harping on how i am a senior person i should not be making this many mistakes, in fact i should be at the stage of my career where i should mentoring other people. She said i don't know if your confidence is down, and i spoke up and said it has gone down, what i really wanted to say yes its gone down, because of her micro managing us and getting down on us for every mistake we make, i also wanted to say that i feel indirect pressure from her which causes me to rush through my work or get anxious... She knows about my anxiety, but has no compassion, her excuse is WE HAVE ALL ISSUES, deal with it. the only good thing she had to say was my a productivity was good last month, and that i take initiative in the dept, but that got put to side when she went back to all her negative things.

My question is how come every year i have always had HIGH PERFORMANCE, this year it may end up low because of the crap i have to hear from her, so why keep me, if my work is not so good than why i am still around 15 years later. ??

i have been working so hard on trying to stay positive, i keep telling myself its going to be a good day, and than someone has to stay something and i feel like crap... i am a very sensitive person so i do take things to heart, maybe not such a good thing, but can't help it this is the way God made me.

so i cried all the way home from work on and off, even my poor kids saw me and asked what happened.

i don't want to be force to quit, that would just give her quit satisfaction but at the same time i don't know how much longer i can take this... its starting to affect me physcially too, my doctor already upped my medication but i really don't think that is going to help the situation.

thanks for reading if you got this far.