Today was a little overwhelming with it being my first day back to work from vacation. All week will probably be like that. Had a hard time focusing and getting back into the swing of things. Still depressed, but at least it gives me something else to focus on.

Can't for the life of me figure out how on earth this episode feels simultaneously terrible but also not that bad. Idk? I don't understand. I think it's because I feel more apathetic and not caring. Not as much guilt, shame, worthlessness this time. It's a different kind of suck. More of a nothingness mixed with emotional restlessness.