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Then don't "let it go" the way it is now... for you, obviously, that won't help you heal.
Maybe by writing all those things down as though you WERE going to send it to her will help.... but may I suggest that instead of writing it to her as "YOU" did this or do that...that you write it as "I have become so upset with you because I want a mother who..." or something like, "When I see you do..... it frustrates me because..." and share with how her actions over the years affected you and what you wanted from her...
....try not to blame her in your writing for truly none of us really know what our own parents have gone through or are going through and each of us react or respond differently to those events... (both of my parents grew up in abusive homes I've realized...tho they are long gone from this earth) You can share that you really don't know why she does/says what she does.
...if you don't attack her, she will be less likely to respond likewise in anger.
...don't expect any response. This is about you really, not her. It's all about your healing. Right now it appears you need to tell her how much you miss not having a mother?
Maybe you won't need to send it after all.
Be well. ((((hug)))
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