Dear youome,

You're right it is a marriage now I say of convenience at least on his part and part of mine. I cannot afford to leave for many reasons. The emptiness really does suck and hurts to my core, but I want to be strong and suck it up. Maybe one day, I can say that I loving me is enough and that will get me through the day. I doubt it, but I am trapped right now and there's no way out. He has broken my heart and once it mends I don't think I will ever give it out again. I am mourning right now and grieving for the love and life I could have had. Thanks for your comfort