Also - don't stop therapy unless you believe yourself to be strong enough to teach and chastise yourself in a loving way the different changes you will need to make in your thinking.

There are books out there to help you but it takes someone that is able to say "yes, I did this and I should not have. No, I am not bad for making a mistake. I will try harder from now on. This is how I will handle it when I am faced with that type of situation again.." and then follow through when you are faced with it. It also takes someone that is able to stop and refocus when they are so mad they could spit nails. So until you can say "yes I can do those things" or at least "yes I am almost sure I can do those things, I want to try"... Keep going to counseling.