{{{{{{{Wendy}}}}}}}}}}

I wanted to answer yours separately for a couple of reasons, I guess.

Yes, I have talked to my pdoc about the hospital. We have definitely scheduled it for next Wednesday, although I may push for one day earlier. I can't go Monday because my CT scan is that day.

I never thought that anyone could do something to fix my problems, except me. I was venting and trying to stay calm by posting my feelings, like most everyone does. I know that ppl care on here, and that has always helped me. Ppl in 3D are fewer to find, that do.

He will never get a job, Wendy. I realized this a long time ago, and frankly have also giving up trying to change him. Yes, it's a lonely existence that I have, but no one can fix that except me. His remarks were rude and completely uncaring and hurtful. They usually are. It shouldn't have hurt me, but it did. It also won't be the last time he is a jerk.

I can't miss Alex's things - life is too short and he needs me there. I'm doing my dangest to hang in there. My pdoc increased my Geodon but it seems to be making my anxiety worse, if that is possible.

I explained my hospital visit to Alex. He says it's my little vacation away from h.........out of the mouth of babes. He understands why I need to go, and I don't think he blames himself. I told him point blank it is not because of him or anything that he has done.

My T is not what I have anticipated. I believe at some time in the near future I will stop that relationship. I am more interested in talking to my pdoc and trying to work on issues with him, rather than my T. I can talk to him, about anything, and he gives valuable insight into things for me.

Thanks for caring.