Why do I keep having to have these up and down moods?????

I called my mum last night to say hello and tell her we're not going there at Christmas and Iwill talk to her in the new year....

My kids dont like her much....I carry a lot of guilt aout that.... She wants to send them money, and my hubby and I although I told her not to......

Today I feel like running and hiding til Christmas is over and done with, yet I love Christmas....

Seem to be growing further apart form hubby every day again... I just dont know what to do....I try to take my own advice in all these poems and stuff I write....what a hypocrite.....

Anyone fancy a lodger for a year???? lol.....only joking NOT..!

Jin xx