Well, but where do you get that positive attitude to start with? I guess in your case it was from another relationship. Maybe it's always from a relationship. And if there's no relationships?... I mean, if I consider a situation in which I suddenly became successful, I'd... actually probably feel undeserving and selfish and anxious because I believe that you're supposed to share, but I wouldn't be able to do it because it would mean interacting with other people... and at this point I can stand only very limited amounts of that.

Except this place where I anonymously let loose a stream of consciousness.