I'm not sure what to advise but that is a tough situation. If you believe you are truly not safe then go to the hospital. But if you're just disturbed by the amount of times you think bad thoughts during the day, but you aren't going to act on them, talk to your therapist about ways to deal with this. Having these thoughts is distressing.
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"I would rather have questions that can't be answered than answers which can't be questioned." --Richard Feynman
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