Ever since i walked away from my big boy job, i have been spiraling down hill. Hospitalized 3 times in 4 months. The meds are fine, but my situation is not. If medication is supposed to counteract mood problems, what counteracts an actual, sh!tty life? What is the dosage of unreachable goals needed to merely stay afloat?

I have often felt like i can not live on my own. But why should i deserve assistance over people who don't have family support and a place to live? I don't think assisted living is for me, until i'm permanently psychotic.

I applied to the department of mental health. Hopefully something there works out. But in the mean time i can barely handle basic responsibilities. It feels like my life was wasted and now i'm just playing in a pile of *****.

If you were me, what would you do?
Can you relate at all?

Thanks