hi boogiesmash
i did talk to a counselor through my Employee Assitance Program and she suggested a write a letter and than once i am done writing it i can call them back up and have one of the counselors input on it before i talk to my manager.

i have had so many therapists in the past so i know what tools i need to get through this.

i think my biggest issue is i replay things in my head that she said to me, or how i am going to talk to her without breaking down and that causes my anxiety to flare up again.

plus i haven't been sleeping well so that could of triggered the anxiety and stress too.