The worst part isn't the question of whether or not my cancer's back. The worst part is how much of me wants it to be back. I want to fly like those before me. I need to be free of this life. Of this hell. Of this torment. The only piece of me that doesn't want it back, is the same piece that's kept me from following through with my desires; all for the sake of those I love. Why can't I be done? Why do I have to sacrifice peace? I just want it to be over. I just want to be done. I need to be done. I need to be free.