I never did time outs or taking things away.

I think I'd suggest you simplify everything for now. Just get in to an easy routine. Let him have lots of control of his own time at home. Like choosing his clothes, give two choices and ask him this or this? Read him lots of story books while snuggling together and have fun.

I let my kids have control as long as they weren't hurting themselves or others. None of this time out stuff. Forget the Super Nanny.

I let my kid wear a winter vest and swim goggles on his head daily for a year. He loved me for it. Do I care what people think?