*possible trigger??*

I’ve managed to push everybody in my life away and cut off contact with everyone (excluding my immediate family). I moved to a new city, half way across the country. A 4 hour plane ride from my home. Why? I’m paranoid, everyone is out to get me, everyone has ulterior motives and is working with the government and they were going to take me.

I’ve lost my ability to work between this and my physical health. I dropped out of university. I’m alone, and I guess that’s what I’ve wanted. I wish I could trust people without being paranoid or forming immediate conspiracies as to why they want to talk to me, but all too often, I do better on my own, BUT this really makes me sicker.

I slipped out of the psychiatric system for about a year, no medication or anything. Cut everything off cold turkey. I just got a new psychiatrist this past week, after my evaluation, it was immediate schizoaffective bipolar type. My diagnosis was schizoaffective before, but it was the depressive type.

Anyway, I got an injection at that appointment and I’m set up a month from now for another appointment and injection.

Where do I go from here? How do I reintegrate into society, into a new city?

Also, I have found since restarting injectable antipsychotic i’ve gotten sort of depressed.

Ok, I'm done my venting. Lol