Hello Struggler: I'm sorry you are struggling with this. I probably don't have much of anything I can offer here. But I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! May the time you spend here be of benefit.

The first thing I wondered about is the possibility of getting off of the Wellbutrin if it's having the dramatic effect on you it seems to be having. Another thing I wondered about is if Exposure Therapy would be of benefit. California therapist Kati Morton has a video on her YouTube channel with regard to this therapy & I recall that she says it's really important to find a therapist who has expertise in the therapy. (Perhaps you just haven't found the right therapist yet?) Kati also has a video on her channel with regard to "Pure O" (OCD). I don't know if what you are struggling with could be considered a type of pure OCD or not. But in her Pure O video, Kati mentions a couple of different therapies that can be beneficial. One, as I recall, is quite new.

Beyond that the only other thing that occurs to me to mention is a practice called "compassionate abiding". Simply put, it is a practice whereby we simply strive to accept intrusive thoughts & emotions with compassion. It is based on the idea that trying to block or stuff down intrusive thoughts only makes them keep coming back stronger & more frequently. Here's a link to a description of the practice:

https://mindsetdoc.wordpress.com/201...e-abiding-101/

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!