I'm married 24 years. Didn't start with issues until 7 years ago. Husband has had severe trauma as well. I'm bpd. I have a question. I beg him to use different pronouns. He often comes at me angry using a "you" statement instead of "I". He's often telling me how I feel. This is hard enough. I don't need that but when I ask him to stick to huis feelings. He screams I have to many rules. I'm so stuck. I am in a loveless no romance mess here. I stopped having sex. Long story. It was physical issues at first then I realized I had been doing it out of guilt for a long time. Now I'm just broken. I've begged my husband to hold me for 2 years. He won't. So my feelings of being unworthy or unlovable are hard to fight. He says everything is my fault because of bpd. I don't know what is correct. I'm so screwed up. I do believe I have bpd. I just think he was a contributing factor to it. Not all his fault but triggering for 7 straight years does that. Help. What's ok to ask for?