Quote:
Originally Posted by Crypts_Of_The_Mind
I do.
A lot lately.
I know logically, that's not truth...but somehow most times, that thought keeps me quiet. Doesn't matter what problem or reason for celebration I may have. Once that thought comes... I go quiet.
Then I spend a few minutes, maybe an hour or so dwelling on "why doesn't anyone care about me?" Usually decide on one or two non-sensical reasons. Then a bit later - I think "what was I thinking? People care - but I don't allow them the chance to respond"
Sometimes I forget to remind myself people get busy at times, or may be considering how to respond, or may have gotten distracted. There are of course times people are selfish and would rather "not be bothered", but I think mostly, people care...just that I want to see or hear it immediately, and not wait.
Generally that happens to me when I am going through high anxiety or high depression. It's hard for me to open up during those times - so when I do, every second it takes to get a response increases the amount of invalidation I feel.
I wonder if there is a way to incorporate what I know logically into the things I think when I am in a high state of depression or anxiety. Maybe that would help me most if I could bridge that gap...
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#1 - I care
you know that.
#2 - I completely know how you feel. There are times when I get really depressed, and I just want to fold up into myself. I don't want to be around anyone else, and no matter what's going on around me, I can't be happy. I don't think logically during those times, I find it hard to think about anything other than being sad.
The thing that seems to help me when I'm feeling like that is when someone reaches out to me, just to say 'hi'. Something as simple as that means a lot to me when I'm really down. And having someone take the time to listen to me ramble about what I'm feeling helps a lot too. I guess we all need to feel like there's someone, somewhere, that cares about us, and that doesn't judge us for how we feel. That's hard to find in this world. There are so many people in this world who are just selfish, just out for what they can get, and with no feelings for who may get stepped on while they climb up one more notch on their make-believe ladder of life.
I'm grateful for people like you, who will take the time to listen, and give of themselves - friendship, compassion, kindness. People like you are a rarity in this world.
