Quote:
Originally Posted by ArcheM
It's not that it's not enough. I really find the idea of a friend hard to define, so to say. I've often struggled with that when it came up on questionnaires, etc. And online makes it even more difficult. I guess I could say that my sister's (possible) ex is my friend, except what if I never talk to him again?
I think I might genuinely have a problem with attachment to people...
I struggle to think of times when my relationships were not dysfunctional in any way. For example, a person I called a friend (in questionnaires at least) the longest time was 7 years my junior when I was in school.
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That's the thing about friendships. They can come and go. Like I said - they don't have the commitment a spouse does. Some frienships may dwindle after just a month. Some may lose contact and then reconnect years later. Some may remain lifelong friends. But there is never a "tight attachment" required with friendships. There is caring, fun, laughter, helping one another, sometimes arguments n forgiveness, and it can bring you close, yes ... but a friendship is one in which you are free to come and go as you wish until such a time one or both of you no longer wish it or the relationship changes.
I have attachment issues as well but it is something I keep a close eye on bc I am acutely aware of it being a part of my BPD.