If you go to marriage counseling, you can learn to communicate better with each other. You can learn (although you may already know) what things you each do to alienate the other person, make them withdraw, make them angry, make them feel loved, etc. You may have the goal for marriage counseling to get your husband to open up, but he may have other goals. You each get to raise things you want to work on and that are problems for you in the marriage. If you went to therapy together, maybe you would learn why your husband withdrew from you during your first pregnancy. And he can work on answering whether he will ever get over that. Men often withdraw from relationships to punish the spouse for something. It would be so much easier if they would say what they want to punish for, but they just withdraw, and the wife never has any idea what has gone wrong. She just feels hurt and emotionally abandoned. It's a common pattern. A marriage counselor could help.

I tried to get my husband to go to marriage counseling over 10 years ago. He wouldn't go, just pretended everything was fine, when it was obvious it wasn't. Now we are getting divorced and as part of that, have had some couples therapy. I wish we had done this many years ago. Maybe it would have helped save our marriage, but the time passed for that and the marriage became unsalvageable.

I would also suggest reading this book, in particular the part about "withholding" in abusive males. It might give you some insights as well as an action plan.
The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to recognize it and how to respond