Kimmydawn, my sweet wonderful friend,

Your words sound so familiar to me. Why is that? Hmmm.... A few of them I said about a week ago and you were there to understand and comfort me. You were there because you are such a kind and giving soul.

All the bad things that you keep thinking about yourself have been put there by the people who have hurt you all your life. You are living in emotional memories. This is your past coming back to bother your heart. It isn't the present. And it isn't the truth. They made terrible mistakes and they took their pain out on you. You never deserved one minute of it. You never deserved to get hurt- NOT ONE TIME, NOT EVER. You should have been held and looked at with loving eyes, and rocked, and told every single day just how wonderful and precious and priceless you really are. You should have had that. You were not one of the lucky ones, and now your heart aches. But it was never your fault that things happened to you the way they did. Look at that precious little boy you are taking care of. Can you imagine a tiny little child, like him, deserving the pain that was put on you? Of course not. You had all the innocence and beauty and worth that he does- AND YOU STILL DO.

Kimmydawn, you are beautiful inside and out. And you are a loving soul in a universe filled with pain, anger, and hurting. You're a positive force in the world in spite of all the forces that conspired against you and tried to tear you down. They didn't tear you down. You Survived. You SURVIVED!!! and you bring new life and love to all around you. Your family and friends. I know you touch my heart just about every day.

Working through the scary and the painful feelings that lurk in the memories is sooo hard. It's like breaking your little hearts all over again. But you can all get through this together, and you have a support system of people here who can understand why you THINK you're bad but who also KNOW that you most certainly are NOT BAD. We all love you here, and we will all be with you every step of the way.

Take care, my friend. You WILL get through this. One step at a time. And remember this (even though it's a cliche, it's SOO true): It's always darkest before the dawn. The sun will rise again, kd

*safe, warm, cozy, loving hugs*
Angela