Scatter, You're not whining at us. We are here for exactly this reason. It's so easy to forget that we are all here for each other when we are the one in need. I do it all the time. And I feel like a dork when I do.

That said, I have only refused treatment in the form of CHANGES and only when manic. pretty typical.

I have taken therapy breaks, but only when things are going really well for a long time. I've been seeing the same T for twelve years and we go on and off sometimes. I always see a doctor regularly and always take my meds as prescribed.

I have no insurance and have on occasion been unable to afford therapy, meds, or recommended hospitalizations, but I think that is different.

I no longer think I "don't need" treatment for my bipolar or that my bipolar is not really a thing. Not since 2010 when I had a severe dysphoric mania. I simply cannot forget something so dreadfully severe and life-threatening.