Hi T,

Sooo... I looked through my insurance papers and found out that my mom made some form of "insurance for complementary-medicine" for me years ago. They'd pay for that breathing therapy thing...
I'm not sure though. The thought that someone might end up touching my body (even if it's just to help me breath) is damn scary. And maybe I don't want to "feel my body"?!? But then I don't want the recurrent feeling to suffocate either...
After going home I remembered that
That wasn't serious though. Should I tell you?

I was at the movies yesterday, watching a childrens movie. The boy in the movie was around 7 years old. He was happy and so lighthearted. I tried to remember that feeling but I couldnt' find it. I must have experienced that childishness, so why can't I remember it? I hate my memory

You've appeared off the past few weeks. Not sure if that is me pushing you away or you not being 100% there. You said that if I don't stop laughing you'll get mad at me. Now I'm worrying that I'm actually to much. Sorry T. Really. I'm trying. There's stuff I still haven't told you that happened during the holidays and I really want to tell you because it's confusing and I can't stop it, but it feels impossible right now

See you...

@prec: You did everything you could. That's not failing, in my opinion