from thedragon's post...
A psychologist I worked with said something similar. She said that if I was in a state of mind where I was both making it up and pretending to doubt it (not to mention acting it out), it means something seriously needs to be addressed in my life, regardless of whether it's DID.

I had a therapist say almost exactly this in a different discussion but then he added an example....

if I was talking to a friend and was both saying I'm a chef and also saying I dont think I could ever be a chef which one is true?

I just looked at him and he must have thought that I didnt understand him so he took it to another example people know since childhood how to play pretend and tell a lie and they know since childhood when they are doing it. he looks out the window and says the sky is blue but I can say to you the sky is green, I know I am pretending and there is no doubt that the sky is really blue. I am just pretending. Since I know the sky is really blue and am pretending its green can I doubt that its blue...when you are pretending you know what is real and isnt (reality testing here) so to say you doubt that the sky is blue cancels out the pretending its green when you know its blue...

another example people can pretend they like a food item that they already know that they hate it and also doubt that they hate it.

I told him I see his point I cant pretend I have DID and also doubt / question whether I have DID. I would not be pretending to have it if I doubted that I have it so where is the conflict in me...why am I saying maybe I am pretending when in the same instant I am doubting that I have it. people dont pretend to have a mental disorder if they dontt want to have it. as human beings we push away things we dont like, dont want...

turned out the conflict was in peer pressure.. I was being peer pressured / bullied into doubting my problem we were discussing and peer pressure/ accused of pretending with the problem that we were discussing. to please those doing the peer pressure I both denied/ doubted and said I was pretending. once my therapist reality testing activity pointed out doing both actually cancelled out each other I was able to see what was real in me and what was not real in me. I knew I was not pretending to have the problem, that the problem existed, that there was no making it up. for me, that was the one and only time I felt like I was crazy enough to make things up thanks to peer pressure. After that no matter the situation I used my reality testing skills to understand what was real or not. since very early childhood I grew up knowing how to play pretend so answering the question of if this for real am I pretending am I making this up was and is always easy for me to answer.