I have some ideas but I don't know if I'd be accurate if I told myself what I think about what others think of me. I might not want to know what others think of me. I may even want to off myself if I was shocked to hear what others think of me if I could hear them talk and they not know that I can hear them. That has happened before.

I feel like, with an honest assessment of myself, I can be a real nice; sweet; genuine person when someone get on the right side of me. But I know that I can be a real jerk if someone gets on the wrong side of me. As far as getting on the wrong side of me is concerned, there are situations where I would hold my cool. Such as at my job and within my immediate neighbors. I think that if I lost it, at where I should hold my cool, then there can be serious ramifications that I would regret.

My 81 year old friend can at times tell me what he sees wrong with me. I don't care to hear about it. Strange how he can not take criticisms about himself very well. The thing that hurts me the most is when he tells me that the other friends that he has are soooo nice; and I am not like them.

For me I want to be real as much as I can. I'd like others to feel that 'what they see is what they get' with me. I don't ever want to be two-faced. I tend to be very nice at work because I like what I do and enjoy the people. I hope they would think of me as nice. At home, it's the opposite of at work.