I didnt tell anyone about what happened yesterday and i think it started getting to me last night. I had a nightmare about it and off and on thought about it today. Its makeing me want to change my mind and drink so damn bad. I searched the house last night but i couldnt find anything. And i'm still sitting here dying for a drink.

I came this close to getting mugged with my nephew when we were leaving the flea market walking past the mint to the truck yesterday. Two guys walking towards us were acting funny and my street sense kicked in fast. I told Tres' to turn and run and go tell the cop at the end of the flea market someone had a gun down this way. He looked at me scared, and i said stern just do it, run, go now. He ran. There was no way i would have made it, i'm a very slow runner and my back wold have been to them. So i confronted them. The one guy grabbed my arm to pull my purse away and with my left arm i punched at his chest and he punched me back in the face. He hit me agian on side my face and i heard the cops come up behind me. One of the guys got away, the one that hit me was caught. I just got a black eye, thats it. But, my nephew was shocked by it. I talked to him the whole way home from the quarter and he just kept saying he dont wanna talk about it. He says hes alright today. I asked him if he had dreams about it and he said no. He told me after it happened he didnt see the guy hit me, but this even ing when he saw my eye he said he saw the guy swing. I been mugged before, held up and %#@&#!. But my nephew never has and im really angry that he had to go through this. He talks to the counsler at his school when ever he wants. I asked him if he was going to talk to her about this. He told me he might mention it to her. I know for myself, stuff like this has happened so often, i just blow it off. But i dont want him to do that. I dont want him to keep this bottled up inside like i do. His grandmother and poppy tried to talk to him about it, but he just said yeah, it wasnt nothing. He talked about the cop breaking the guys nose, cause it was bloody. but thats it. I cant get this off my mind and i want a drink so i can forget about it. Just get drunk and pass out. Why am i so scared to face my emotions? this is so hard.