Quote:
Well first I would like to congratulate you on being able to quite smoking. That's not an easy thing to do… you should be very proud of yourself. 
As with forming relationships it is obviously also not an easy thing… One of the first things you have to do is be willing to commit to the time and effort it takes to build a relationship. And if your up to that challenge… then I don't see why you can't have good relationships with others.
Here are some little tips that might help you get there:
-smile & eye contact
-open body language
-use the person's name
-don't underestimate the power of doing little things for people
-listen
-ask them questions about themselves
-be caring and kind
-be positive
-and last but not least make them feel very special
These are only some of the things you can do for others… And although it's a lot to take in, I'm sure you can do it. Best of luck to you Althuzia.
|
I use quite alot of body language and smile. I find eye contact a bit awkward, especially for long(er) periods of time. I ask them questions as I do not have a lot to tell about myself.
Quote:
Connecting 101: Sharing.
Common interests are a good place to start yes, but if we never share (reciprocally) on a deeper level (hopes, dreams, fears etc) then a solid connection cannot be formed.
I hope you are able to find what you're searching for 
|
The problem might lie here. but to be frank I don't have much hopes/dreams other than just finding a place to live by myself whether with or without future companion. Also I always feel like other people already have their group of friends around to talk about these things. And even if I'd had friends I don't know at what point it would be appropriate for me to share these things. As i've never learned to do so on a deeper level as a child/teen, i since about highschool i've kept my feelings and emotions to myself.
Quote:
Hi!
I can relate with most of the things you've said, except I don't have siblings. Had no friends growing up and at most a buddy in highschool and a buddy or two in university/masters. Now I have two friends I hang out with once a week or once every two weeks but I have little in common with one of them.
Point is, it's hard for me to make friends as well, partly out of mild introversion coupled with a bit of social anxiety, partly because I stick out as different due to being unfeminine and also in big part by having little experience with socializing on a deeper level, holding small talk, etc.
If you have hobbies, I would suggest meetup groups, especially since you're in a very diverse place. Meeting people who get together precisely to enjoy a common interest can make it easier to make friends cause the people there are interested at least in one of your hobbies and you have that to start interacting with them.
Then, as others have said, try to open up about yourself, ask questions about the other person's life, show interest in what they're saying . Those things work, especially if there's nothing visibly "different" about you, that could influence interactions before you say anything.
|
my hobbies are listening to music and video games. I've also picked up fitness again about 2-3 months ago. I'd like to join something like aboard game group or maybe try to play some D&D for the frist time. I've always like board games, but i've never met anyone who thought the same. Even today I don't know where I could find a group like this.