I know we all have different experiences and views of life, and it is all subjective. My personal experiences have been ugly in life. Yes I am not poor, and healthy (at least I think so but I am not sure), but still life hasn't been beautiful to me. My mind rejects the reality and I feel I was put here in life, as in an arena where no matter how much effort I put and how hard I fight, I will lose eventually ... to the dark monster, death. Some people seem to accept this fact and fight their fights until they lose, others give up early, but there is no point in fighting in the first place other than postponing death.

I enjoy going out, and riding the bike is the best means for me because I will be doing something acceptable while alone, but this joy is short. But I don't see life as something beautiful just because I enjoy riding the bike. The majority of my day and days are awful.