Yes - this is abuse, no matter the circumstances. If you fear for your safety (as I think you should if he is choking you til you cannot breathe), make yourself a "go bag". This is a bag with a couple changes of clothes, the items you may need to survive (like medications), any important documents you may need - hospital records, police or court papers, etc, a few toiletries (hairbrush, toothbrush), and any odds n ends you cannot do without.. Then call the nearest womens abuse shelter and plan a time you know he will be out of the house - once that time comes, grab your go bag, and go.