Ajisa I can really relate to some of the hardships you describe experiencing because I lived through them myself during my lifetime...

-feeling lost
-being overly self-conscious and struggling with insecurities
-insomnia and low energy

Hang in there...

Have you heard the expression "You are your own worst enemey" before? Ever feel that way? I think it's more accurate to state that our physical minds can be our own worst enemies... The often incessant and uncontrollable mind 'chatter' that can be so critical and judgemental of of ourselves - and which can reinforce really 'negative' and self-defeating ways of thinking about ourselves and our lives...

Reading through your post I was given the impression that you might stand to really benefit from finding ways to quiet your physical mind activity and to relax your mind... When we direct too much of our conscious energy towards our physical mind and it's sometimes dysfunctional ways of operating - it's like a 'force' that grows stronger and this can (as you know) have the ability to create a lot of suffering for us. Now, if you can find ways for you increase the amount of time that you experience your state of consciousness where the physical mind is more relaxed and 'in the background' as opposed to dominating the scene - you will in effect be disempowering those habitual negative thought-patterns and starving them of the conscious energy that they need to survive. I know this isn't easy to accomplish but it can be done and can absolutely improve your sense of well-being...

I strongly encourage you to conduct some research into 'ways to relax your mind' (or similar search phrases) and keep searching until you find a practice or activity that works best for you!

As for myself, I really enjoy listening to Classical music... It has no lyrics so there is nothing for your mind to process in terms of language, and the tones/frequencies/resonances of the Classical instruments really relaxes me and promotes a sense of calmness & trainquility... Here is a short write-up about the effects of Classical music on the brain/body:

Effect of Classical Music on the Brain
http://www.classicalforums.com/artic...sic_Brain.html

Also, taking long walks can be very beneficial for your psychological well-being and has proven to be an effective means for some individuals to combat feelings of depression - and of course the physical activity is also good for your physiological health. I read a short book a couple years ago about how walking is a form of bilateral therapy because the repetitive motion stimulates both hemispheres of the brain and that this is conducive to processing our challenging emotions stored inside us. The author was advocating walking as a form of therapy and suggested that you allow yourself to connect with your difficult emotions and mental-thoughtforms while you are engaged in this activity (this is key)... So I know you said you were experiencing low-energy but see if you can bring yourself to start going for long walks (preferably somewhere quiet and closer to nature)... You could even combine relaxing (lyric-less) music with your walking... Tell yourself that you're going to explore this option/activity for a few weeks and see how it affects you and how you feel afterwards... What have you got to lose here by doing this? : )

P.S. - congrats on getting accepted to a good college!