i don't feel that i can generate much sympathy from anyone. on the outside everything is fine. i appear to be functioning. i also have a strong personality. my only outward symptoms are the unnamables: trichotillomania and self injury.

but inside i am a mess. i don't think that people want to hear about my struggles, though, since i don't look like i'm at rock bottom.

i am not sure even i allow myself to think of my problems. i am too fortunate to have problems. sometimes i think of ways to appear more vulnerable, more lovable, but at the same time, i lack the knowledge or innate ability to show myself, or to connect genuinely with people

all i wish is for someone to understand me and not be repulsed. i wish to have someone with me… maybe as proof of my existence.