Well I guess it's reassuring knowing that I'm not the only One who has this problem at times. I just want to feel really Good for once. I just want to feel like me. THAT feeling I can recognize and identify when I am in it.
Feeling numb isn't okay with me either.

I think perhaps I am hyperfocused on how I am doing, which is just making me question it even more and become all mixed up in what or how I am feeling. Maybe I am so scared of becoming really depressed again, that I am too busy bracing myself for the next fall than focusing on noW? I dunno.

It's like anxiety and anger and fear and depression and frustration all are closely intertwined and I can't figure out where one ends and the next begins. Life shouldn't always feel this hard. My brain really needs a shut off switch.

Anyway- here's hoping I will have a fantastic weekend and be able to definitively pick out the right smiley face to depict my mood....
Take care all.